Informing your children that you and your spouse have plans to divorce requires compassion and tact. However, you must also carefully consider how you will break the news to your parents.
These are some tips to help you have the conversation without adding to the stress of going through a divorce in New York.
Approach your parents after you finalize your decision
Avoid discussing your marriage with your parents until after you and your spouse come to a decision and your children know your plans. Parents who mean well may not be privy to the details leading to your divorce and may pressure you to reconsider or second-guess your decision, adding to your stress.
Let them express their disappointment
Your parents may like your spouse and regret the changing dynamics your divorce causes. Remember that your announcement may shock them and they will need time to come to terms with the news. Offer your parents compassion and avoid being defensive when they express their feelings.
Share your feelings
Although you may want to ensure your parents that you have a good handle on the situation, you should also freely share your emotions with them. Sharing your emotions can be cathartic for you and gives your parents an opportunity to channel their feelings in ways that allow them to feel helpful.
Ask for their support with your children
Regardless of their feelings, your parents want to support you but may not want to overstep. Let them know that they play a vital role in your children’s lives and are essential for helping them cope with the changes they face.
Whether your New York divorce is acrimonious or amicable, informing your parents soon after you make your decision will alleviate your stress and help you move on with your life.